98. BURNING WRATH

How could I have loved him so much, now that I hate him to the point 

that I wish that he rot and burn in the bottomless pit for eternity?

How is it possible that I am so angry with him for betraying my love 

and now wish that he could feel what I had felt when he broke my being 

when, at one time, he was enthroned in my heart and had his name 

laced upon my lips so that each time I licked them I would swallow 

his soul bit by bit to become one with me? 

How could I be hating him so much now that I keep wishing that the sun 

never rise for him so that he gropes in total darkness for the remainder 

of his days as punishment for him for forsaking me and my purest love? 

How could it had been him that my heart chose to beat for, for which my eyes 

chose to pour out futile tears, upon which my lips chose to lay kisses 

now that I think of him as the most vile and filthy thing
that I have come across my entire life? 

But for as long as my heart still beats, as long as my eyes still cry tears, 

as long as my mind still plays the memory of those days I had with him, 

as long as he still walks on this earth, I will wish him joy, 

then wish him pain, praise him then despise him, pray for him, then condemn him.

I am still so mad with him for loving me the way he did, 

then forcing me to leave him, because I had no other choice, 

because I hate him for taking away the only love I ever had in my heart. 

- M@t@Maya (© 01-05-2010)